Grandmotherism......why grandparents move out of state

Ok so Lindsay brings the girls over so her, Alyssa and the older girls can go swimming (she knows the manager of the motel of course). Bob and I go to get the grill ready and I'm inside preparing burgers and such. My back is killing me from picking up boxes in the garage so I'm not in the mood to even breathe. During this, Maggie says mawmawmawmawmawmawmawmawmawmaw and I say what Maggie....and she doesn't say a word. I told her go in the other room while I'm cooking. Very shortly she's back mawmawmawmawmawmaswmawmawmaw so I scooted her back to the living room and put the gate up in the door to keep her and the dog out. I'm getting stuff ready, here comes Lilly...mawmawmawmawmawmaw is it ready? I said now you know I'll tell you when it's ready, go watch your movie. I asked them what they want and they want a cheeseburger instead of a hot dog, so that's what they get. Maggie eats the bun and leaves the meat, so I tell her she can't have any pudding if she doesn't eat her meat (and immediately thought of Pink Floyd). I've got Jasmine locked in the back bedroom because she barks non stop during dinner and she's STILL barking. I FINALLY get all the plates ready, go to take mine (my rare hot dog on a bun) and somehow when sitting down the plate bent or something because all my slaw did a nosediver to the floor. Screw it, I'll clean it as soon as I'm done. Now Lilly wants more food, a hot dog. Maggie is yelling DONE and I told her no, you have to eat the meat if you want pudding later. He gives Lilly her hot dog and she ate it before he could sit back down and is now asking for a drink, she knows drinks come when food is eaten. They finish and I go to give them some chocolate milk. Maggie's sippy cup is in the dishwasher washing, so I give her a cup with a straw built in. She takes the top off and dumps it when she tries to look inside. and now Lilly is reminding me, for the umpteenth time, to turn on another movie for them. I go back and turn it on and ask Maggie if she needs changed, she says no but that doesn't mean anything. I put her up on the bed and she'd shit, not a normal one but an epic one. I go to get the wipes and a storebag and tell Lilly to hold the bag for me. I'm holding Maggie by her feet mostly up in the air so it doesn't get on her clothes or anything and Lilly is holding the bag. I get all the wipes portioned out and with the first set, I grab a nice big load of runny diarrhea and I'm reaching for the bag. I turn around to put it in the bag and Lilly is spinning in circles. LILLY WHAT ARE YOU DOING? She stops and looks at me puzzled, so I can finally complete my task, all the while telling Maggie she's too old to go poo poo in the diaper, she has to tell me and go to the potty. I finally get out on the back porch to have a smoke and I call Lindsay, who is visiting Helen, and tell her I'm going to kill her children and tell her why. Well she thinks this is hysterical and is just cackling...so I told her when they go swimming I'm going to bring the earthworm shocker and drop it in the pool.